It is as it is
After all these years of trying to adjust my expectations of what a parent/child relationship can or should be,I must keep readjusting my expectations. Just as soon as I think I have accepted the impersonal relationship and I am adept at steeling my heart against hurt and surprise ,I am always surprised at the level of cold mean hearted attacks I receive out of the blue. I can't believe the level of cruelty bestowed upon me,so I have to constantly redefine our relationship. I wish I could be as cold hearted so as to not feel the hurt. Maybe I don't want to be that way.